Yesterday I took part in the Warrior Dash. Whose 3.2 Hellish miles is accurately portrayed on it's website. http://www.warriordash.com/
Joanna and I arrived on site and all we could see were mushroom clouds of smoke and fire balls shooting up from the starting line. Meanwhile dozens of people were sliding and bouncing their way down a huge mud covered hill towards the finish line as a sea of dirty, rotten, filthy, people walked past us caked in mud from head to toe with smiles from ear to ear . My first thought was "What the Hell did I sign up for?" My second thought was this is going to rock!
Joanna and I checked our bag & made our way to the starting line. There must have been nearly 200 people in our wave alone. We ran up a huge hill with a 30 degree incline. Once we arrived at the top- the mud started and it did not end. Holy schnikey! I've never seen so much mud! We were up to our ankles in it, then our knees, then were were slip sliding down the trail over rocks and roots, branches and over the occasional downed tree. Poison ivy to the left and a pool of thigh deep swamp water to my right. Hmm which way do I go? Splash! Squishy mud, at least up to my ankles covered the entire course. The course was only about 5-6 feet wide and less than that 3 in some areas and mud, muck and maneur (I swear that there was crap up in that field...you know it!)
Then there were the obstacles. We knew when they were ahead of us because of all the the "DANGER" signs that were posted. We had to climb over wooden walls that were about 7 feet high then crawl under barbed wire--there were about 6 of these. Then came a wooden wall that went straight up about 20 feet high that we had to climb up and over using a rope & then scale the ladder down the other side. We had to cross through tangled ropes, and climb up a suicide hill of death which made even the big boys whimper. After that we had to walk across boards like a balance beam, the boards were angled up and down so the chances of slipping off them were great. I think my mud covered feet helped with my ability to balance. Wohoo! There was so much mud that the race director couldn't put the tires down on the ground because they just would have sunk and someone would have broken a leg for sure so instead they tied the tires from a wooden fixture and we just swung them around back and forth tring to bash the people behind us--all in good fun of course, after all, this was supposed to be a challenge. Then we slid down a muddy hill on our butts as if it were a slide in a nearby park. Once I saw the flaming logs of fire I got so happy and excited. As the music grew louder I knew the end was drawing near. I leaped over the first fire pit--shazam! So, with all my confidence, I decided to do a tuck jump over the 2nd fire pit and raise my hands in the air like a cheerleader. When I landed the jump, the fireman gave me a dirty look and shook his head. I'm not sure why, it's not like my underpants caught on fire or anything! I was just out having a bit of fun, you know covered in mud and manure from head to toe jumping over firey flames of death. Just having a bit of fun that's all!
From there we ran down the muddy slope and could see the really high cargo net that we had to climb up, over and down. Hooray almost there. I never knew how many different types of mud existed and how many stages of drying there were. We climbed up and over and headed towards the hill. "Stay to the right and you'll go faster" the girl said. So I slid down the wicked steep, slippery, muddy hill of horror and I'm at the bottom about to stand up when someone shouts "watchout!" I quickly and skillfully did a barrel roll to my right as the chick behind me came flying down and crashed into the big heaping muddy pile of shit below.
We jumped and ran through you guessed it... more mud to the final obstacle where we had to crawl like a spider on crack over 3 cargo nets and then run across the finish line! HOORAY! Showers? I need a shower, so I follow the signs for the showers. Well the shower turned out to be a was a giant snowmaking gun! I ran into the snow making area and got blasted and pelted with wind, hail and rain. It was like being stuck in the middle of a hurricane with ice pelting your face. The wind was so fierce I though my contacts were going to blow right out of my eyes. The hail stung my face little a million little bees. I couldn't stop cackling, hooting and screaming because the feeling was so cold and ridiculous. The snow maker made all the mud run and so I just toweled off. Ewwwe! I was now dripping mud. My old sneakers were now useless so I donated them.
![]()
Run, Drive Sleep? Repeat. This is the mantra of the Ragnar Relay. Ragnar is a 200 mile, 24-hour, overnight, running race which takes place in different parts of the country.
One day, this winter, I was at EMS gearing up for my dog-sledding trip when I saw a sign that read "Runners Wanted: 200 mile relay from Yale to Harvard. See Ashley" Needless to say this peaked my curiosity. I asked to speak with Ashley--but she wasn't in. So I left my business card. A few days later Ashley reached out to me and before I knew it I found myself signing up for an insane, 200 mile, overnight, running, relay race.
In an effort to recruit more runners, I went to work and casually mentioned at I was running a 200 mile relay race in May. Some people looked at me weird and said I "was crazy" while another one signed up to join me. clikc here to see what a typical conversation sounds like.
Months turned into weeks which turned into days and then into hours. With less than 24 hours on the clock our 12 member Team was reduced by 3. One person had injured themselves and 2 others bailed out. Needless to say everyone was scrambling around to convince 2 more people that we were a totally sane group of people who were running 200 miles while sleeping with randon strangers in a van while eating out of the trunk and that they should be cool and join our team. We didn't have much luck. Our Team of 12 was now a Team of 10. Our captain, Ashley, was busy organizing all the last minute details. Making sure that everyone on our team had reflective vests, headlamps tail-lights for the night run and reorganizing the legs of the race. I made a copy of the map for our vehicle and then called my mother to see if I could borrow her Suburban for the ride. Which, thankfully enough, she let me use otherwise we would have had to hire a vehicle.
Vest-check
Headlamp-check
Tail-lights-check
Sleeping bag & pillow-check-check
Water-check
Granola-check
GU-check
Cash-check
Wipes-check
Spare runners-check
Xtra clothing-check
Then it was off to Joanna's house-which served as our Rally point for the race. Got there around 7:30ish and was the only one there. Everyone else was still in Worcester waiting for Alison (a last minute recruit) to join up with the team. Finally around 11pm Joanna and I decided to hit the hay we really weren't sure when the other team members would arrive. We woke up around 3:00 in the morning and the rest of the Team came rolling in the driveway. Team 1 rallied together and headed down to New Haven, CT while members of Team 2 got to sleep in a bit.
I drove down to New Haven while everyone else was getting some much needed R&R before the race. Our starting time was 6:00 am and I was Runner #1. We arrived at New Haven at around 5:45 which was just enough time to go to the ladies' room and check-in. I went over to the starting line and they had a cart-wheel contest. So I did a cart-wheel--wheeee! It was then, that I noticed, I had no race number on me and I didn't have the slap bracelet timing device. Meanwhile all my team members were sitting in the Suburban. "Shit!" I couldn't hang to see if I won the cartwheel contest, I had to run over to the Suburban to find out where the *uck my number and slap bracelet was. With no time to think, someone grabbed a number and handed it to me. In a fury, I pinned it on, only later to find out this number was supposed to be attached to our vehicle and not my chest! HAHA, it was a real shit show! I ran over to the starting line and boom-we're off.
I was so tired. I ran and ran and kept running. The course was poorly signed with mid-night blue markers and there was no support on the course. I kept running and looking and my watch and I was still running. I thought--what the *fuck! I should have been at the transition area about 7 minutes ago, so I just kept running a bit more and thought--oh hell no! I've been running for much longer than this leg was supposed to be. Something is wrong! Thankfully enough I had my cell phone on me. Then I realized--shit! I don't have any of my teammates numbers plugged into my phone! Damn it! So I'm running through an industrial park, that has no street signs and I go into one of the buildings, which is closed because it's only like 6:20 on a fricking Friday morning. Luckily enough, there was a cleaning guy in the office and he came out to me, eying me up and down, saying with his eyes "YOU is crazy lady." I asked him for a business card so that I would know my exact location and I called Joanna from Team #2. Joanna was like "you're near transition #2!" You're going to have to cut over this street, bang a right and you'll see runners passing you in the opposite direction, because they have already exchanged at transition #1" I thought "okay, thank you, love you.." Joanna had just saved my life and our teams ass!
Running back to transition #1, I still wasn't sure that I was going the right way, then I saw some runners pass in the opposite direction and a van drove past me. The driver stuck her head out the window and shouted "Your team is just ahead waiting for you" I though "THANK fricking GOD!" Oh and by just head she meant another mile or so. I got to T1 and my teammates informed me that some Shit Head Pranksters had stolen some of the signs that said "Turn right here" and wound up screwing up the 1st leg of the race. Needless to say the race didn't start off quite as I had planned and from that leg onward we all became a little paranoid so every runner carried a map with them just in case there were more sign stealing douchbags on the course .
I don't think anyone else got lost on the course, there were no injuries and the race went pretty smoothly after that. Jonathan was brave enough to don his Brave Heart kilt & war paint for which he was well suited. He prooved that he was a total warrior on the 2nd leg of the course by attacking the biggest most toilsome hills my eyes have ever gazed upon in both the rain and fog.
There were a few mishaps on the way, Chris lost his bag but a good Samaritan turned it in and we were able to back track and pick it up. I got car sick and blew chunks on the side of the road.
Team members Brett, Alison and Chris were real troopers picking up extra legs. Brett, a US Army firefighter was also a great help with the driving. A Suburban is nothing compared to a fire truck! Day 2 we milled into town had breakfast at a local diner, all the blue-hairs were looking at us funny. Maybe it was the tuna sandwich Chris ordered at 8:00 am or was it the fact that we had forgotten that we didn't really look "normal" anymore. Jon was still dressed up like Braveheart, war paint and all, while the rest of us had been up for over 28 hours and were nasty in our stinky, running gear and were ordering ridiculous food.
There was little sleep and plenty of laughter. Everyone had a great time, keeping clean with baby wipes, eating enough granola, gu and beef jerky to feed a small army all while cherring, running and driving.
Our epic journey began 31 hours ago at Lighthouse Point, it took us along the scenic back roads of Connecticut, alongh Long Island sound, past Nathaniel Hale's homestead, through the milltowns of Massachusetts and commenced in the heart of Boston at Harvard. There we all joined Ashely in sprinting across the finish line and were awarded our gigantic and well earned Ragnar Medal which of course, duals as the biggest, baddest beer bottle opener ever. Together we enjoyed sipping Sam Adams and munching pretzels in the beer garden. All in all, the camaraderie was great and there was very little time for sleep. The Ragnar Relay stands true to it's mantra of Run, Drive, SLEEP? Repeat
Great race, great people and I would recommend this race to everyone! http://www.ragnarrelay.com/
